Some people pursue marriage counseling with a clear idea of what they want to talk about while others know they want help but aren’t sure what they should talk about. Thankfully, counselors are accustomed to this and know how to help.
Why should we consider marriage counseling?
Marriage counseling is a valuable opportunity for couples to grow closer to one another. They do this by addressing and working through various issues in their relationship with the support and guidance of a counselor. They can also grow closer by learning new skills and strategies to strengthen their relationship. Redlands Christian Counseling offers couples a safe space to work through challenges and build a stronger, more connected marriage.
A common misconception is that there needs to be a problem in your marriage to pursue counseling. While counseling is a good resource when you face issues like infidelity, changes in family dynamics, and loss, it is also helpful for other things.
Consider your car. Sometimes you take it to the mechanic when there is a problem. It could be as minor as a slow tire leak or something major like a blown radiator. Either way, you go to the mechanic to fix the problem. While a counselor is not a mechanic, they can offer tools to help you and your spouse fix problems in your relationship.
Now consider other things you do to take care of your car. You change the oil, get new wiper blades, and fill up with gas. These are routine things you do to maintain your vehicle. Similarly, a counselor can help you with the routine maintenance of your marriage. You can make small tweaks, learn strategies, and implement new ideas that keep your marriage strong and healthy.
To help you as you consider marriage counseling, here are some key topics that are commonly discussed:
Communication.
Healthy, effective communication is an essential part of a healthy marriage. However, it doesn’t always come naturally. It is a skill that needs to be learned and adjusted over time. A counselor can help you develop techniques for better communication such as active listening, expressing feelings, and conflict resolution.
Intimacy and emotional connection.
Marriage is all about connection. It is important to address your emotional, physical, and even spiritual intimacy in your marriage. Doing this can help you grow closer and understand one another more fully.
Trust and openness.
Trust is essential in a marriage. A counselor can help you and your spouse address any trust issues that may impact your relationship. They can also teach you how to communicate openly and honestly to build deeper trust.
Roles and responsibilities.
Everyone has their own ideas of the roles and responsibilities within a marriage. Take time to clarify expectations around things such as household chores, finances, parenting, and work.
Family dynamics.
Family can involve a lot of different people Consider the role of extended family in your marriage. Learn how to set boundaries and navigate challenges in ways that feel agreeable to you and your spouse.
Money.
Finances can be an area of contention for many couples. A counselor can help you talk about your financial goals, budgeting, spending habits, and how you want to manage your money as a couple.
Conflict resolution.
Conflict is inevitable in a relationship between two people. In a marriage, it is important to learn effective ways to manage disagreements and resolve conflicts, so you don’t argue and breed resentment. A counselor can help you find compromises that satisfy you and your spouse.
Life goals, plans, and dreams.
Over time, couples can lose sight of this element of a relationship. A counselor can help you and your spouse share your personal goals as well as those you and your partner share. Together, you can create life goals, dreams, and plans and support one another in pursuing them.
Stress and coping strategies.
Stress happens in everyone’s life at some point. Talk to a counselor about what causes stress for you as individuals and as a couple. Then you can explore healthy coping mechanisms to help you and your spouse manage stress and support one another.
Time.
An important element of a healthy marriage is how you spend your time. Explore the idea of time in your counseling sessions. Think about how you spend time together and how you spend time on your own. Consider activities you both enjoy, hobbies, commitments, and the quality of your time together.
Remember, every couple is unique. A counselor will tailor your marriage counseling sessions to your specific needs, goals, and challenges. They will guide you through discussions and help you develop practical strategies for a stronger and more fulfilling relationship. Reach out to a counselor at Redlands Christian Counseling to get started.
“Dream Come True”, Courtesy of Oziel Gomez, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Happy Couple”, Courtesy of Alba Rebecca, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Couple by the Pond”, Courtesy of SJ Objio, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License
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Kate Motaung: AuthorKate Motaung is the Senior Writer, Editor, and Content Manager for a multi-state company. She is the author of several books including Letters to Grief, 101 Prayers for Comfort in Difficult Times, and A Place to Land: A Story of Longing and Belonging...
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